Brittanie, I just started looking into home loan preapproval as a self-employed person, and ran into some of the road blocks you mentioned. In my case I was asked for two years of tax returns demonstrating my self-employment income. Well, I am newly self-employed, so I don’t have any tax returns that show my SE income yet.
The first lender I spoke with told me I would not qualify for a home loan, period. They were nice enough but basically told me to try again in two years.
The second lender I spoke with said she would investigate “exceptions” for me, but I have not heard back from her yet. I suspect I simply have to bite the bullet and wait for two years. Maybe I can keep socking away a bigger down payment until then!